poeming on the day I woke up feeling better



Law of Average

two weeks and six days sick this month
virus driven deep into my lungs, hacking
coughs and aches all over, fatigue, fatigue, fatigue.

and this isn't normal averages, this is my average,
my asthmatic life, my asthmatic immunity.
my asthmatic need to stop everything and rest
when my head is hollering, "but look at the bathroom sink!"

but what is average and what is real is the painful
intersection of patience and overdoing things.
I can be the good patient for only so long, I forget,
I dose myself up on ibuprofen and walk around the house,
vacuuming because my feet can't stand the dust bunnies. 

two weeks, six days, an eternity of summer, when I'd 
rather be out taking photographs, I'd rather be out playing,
I'd rather be out grocery shopping, and ok, I did go, because 
we needed tooth paste and apples and these are things

I can't let go of, the world in me, the shock of asthma slimed 
lungs, reminding me again and again what it is I love: this world,
this faulty, fucked up world, with its incandescent burning beauty