Singing the Song of Me
Ralph Waldo Emerson
The things that make me unique are also things that other people might see as flaws. (Things even I might see as flaws, lets be honest!)
But you know, when I look at this self-portrait (which I took on the day before Remy started school), even though I do see those flaws, and the weariness, I also see my beauty.
(I mean, even just my dreadlocks? Wow. Those are some wild four and a half year old locks I've got going there! ROCK ON with your bad self!)
This is the wabi sabi beauty of having lived. Of having seen and done the things that I have done in my life.
And such a life it has been and is, so far!
I have been to Paris, twice. I have been to Spain and Amsterdam. I have been to Tahiti and Bora Bora and Mexico.I have lived in so many places, it boggles some people when I tell them (and I relish it).
I have had so many amazing life experiences. But the greatest thing of all is that I have somehow been able to retain my uniqueness all along. To keep singing the song of myself, in whatever key it happens to be sung in at the moment.
I have lived. And I have lived as me. And I don't know how many people can say that, truly.I do know that it is possible for everyone to start living their own life, to be their own selves. I also know that it is difficult. Going against the grain of what has been pounded into us is difficult.
It took me ten years (plus or minus) to get the courage up to have my hair the way I had always wanted it. (Before that, I did have it in awesome colors or in neat new hair cuts, but I always wanted dreadlocks, always, and it took me a long time to actually do it. And now they're mine. Completely me. I love it.)
Being authentically you is an ongoing process. I don't think I was any less authentic for not having dreadlocks (just as I'm not less authentic right in this moment for not having rainbow colored locks... the thought of going through the mess of dying them just doesn't suit me at this moment in time. But I think it will eventually come to pass).
And your you isn't necessarily going to be rainbow dreadlocked. Rock your own self, dammit!
(And actually, focusing on the outer you isn't really the important part, either, I'm just overly in love with my locks today :D)
Start be-ing you, more and more each day. It's fun! Keep at it, and soon you'll have a moment of aha, where you realize there's no one else quite like you in this world.
(Except that we are still One, and we're a lot more similar than we are different, but that's a point for another day.)