poeming on a friday

what is

outside it is 35 degrees
inside it is 68 degrees
i am almost done with my
first cup of coffee
i added condensed milk
i am trying to wean off sugar
i need to go cold turkey
i am coughing up
the end of this damn cold
there is no music
i feel fragile
i am about to see a movie
that terrifies me
even before viewing:
zero dark thirty
(too soon, too soon)
and compels me
(i want to know)
it will probably win an oscar
or all of them, too soon to say
the last time i wept
for two and a half hours
was seeing Les Miz
but i knew all the words
and could mouth them
through my tears
good medicine
this time i know
the outcome
and how
there is no medicine
to make it better
just endless

* My plan is to go to the movie and if it is too brutal, to leave in the first ten minutes (which are the most brutal).
*Editing to add: Since my mother was concerned, I just wanted to add that my anxiety was unjustified. I didn't think the movie was that bad. Yes, there's depiction of torture. That happened. I would say the movie depicted -and maybe argued for - things I don't agree with, but it was well done.