down to the roots...
So, yes, this really happened on Tuesday* afternoon!!
We shaved most of my head, and combed out the top dreadlocks into brushable 'hawked hair.
I did a live-instagraming of the process, starting with this version of the photo on the left, where I said I was "thinking about a drastic hair cut" which is code for, "my husband agreed to shave my head after Remy gets home so we don't freak him out." (That's not a sad face, that's my contemplating big stuff face.)
I did have to remind Remy that girls can have short hair and boys can have long hair (his friends at school are way into genderized hair but we don't play that game at home) and then he kept saying "Oh my gosh!" while M was cutting/ shaving. It was super cute. Then he did his homework while we finished up.
It feels incredible to be able to run my hands over my scalp again. This is actually much closer to my scalp than I've ever been. I have never had shaved hair!
I knew this would be the next step after dreadlocks for me. While it is possibly to comb hair out that has been knotted, it was clear that the end of this locked journey for me would be going down to the roots (I've been saying that since I started them - I also knew I'd have them for at least five years. It was six and a half.
I didn't know when they would be shaved, but I knew it would happen. And Tuesday was the right time.
Side note: I actually wasn't sure about keeping the longer hair on top. I'm still not entirely sure about it, but I love 'hawking it up, so I'll keep it for now. I'm considering bleaching it out and coloring it (purple and teal were suggested... which sounds just about right to me. Although I'm leaning towards fuchsia as well...).
My next set of locks will be started by a real loctician. Yes, I am already talking about my next set of locks. I loved having dreadlocks, it was just time for a change. I'm guessing my next set will be started sometime in my forties I'll spend some time here with short (shaved) hair. I love it very much. Eventually I think I'll be ready to grow it out.
One never really knows, does one? Not for sure, for sure.
So here I am right here, today, with hair that fits this moment of my life. Shaved down to my roots.
I am continuing to expand my sense of self, my sense of the unity of life.
Yesterday, at the dentist, the owner of the practice I go to (who has quite awesome hair herself, short and spiked up and colored bright red) said to me, "I wish I could be that brave with my hair." My jaw kind of dropped. Then I asked her about her hair color.
And my dentist (who is also locked) said, after doing a double take, not realizing it was me til she saw my ninja toe shoes, "You're getting ready for Thailand!" And both of those things are true: I needed to be brave to let go of the locks (wondering what I would look like shaved*) and I am getting ready for the intensity of our month in Thailand.
Letting go of what isn't serving me.
It was the right time.
Here I am. Getting down to the roots of everything.
* I would have blogged this yesterday, but I forgot that getting dental work done on the lower teeth is much more intensive and I spent all of yesterday in a Novocaine haze. It was unpleasant enough that I needed to nap.
* That fear of what I'd look like? Totally unnecessary. I still look like me. Just with shorter, more punk hair. It takes some getting used to, because it is a drastic change, but I am still me.