embracing 2014 (aka my awesome year in review)

my last selfie of 2014: yes

Past years in review:

A List of Awesome Stuff I did in 2011
Awesome Stuff 2012
the shock and awe that was 2013

Normally, I wrap up the year at the end of December. But this year, I let winter break be winter break. I relaxed. (A lot.) We went on adventures. We read many books.

So my 2014 wrap up is being written today and that feels right.

(I'll also do an actual wrap up of the #lexsurrealsoul14 project at some point, hopefully next week. I'm taking tomorrow off because my love is staying home and we have date day plans.)

And you know what? The fact that I'm taking tomorrow off and doing things a little differently and letting myself relax about - well, everything - is really indicative of this year for me.

It was, after all, my embracing year. 

Embracing what is. 2014's winter, I'm looking at you. That was a lot of snow. And I lived through it.

Embracing change. I rearranged the kitchen and worked out a plan for rearranging the living room, even if I didn't get around to moving the couches until Jan. 3. We also bought a new car. We all love our Mini Countryman.

Embracing grief. Embracing my grief. And embracing the grief that isn't mine, but reminds me of the grief at the heart of the world. Going to another funeral. Learning that one of the girls I used to babysit as a teenager is dead. (I never even wrote about that here. It came so out of the blue.) Embracing the fact that I have so much damn fucking experience with grief that writing a book about it makes sense. Even if the book has stalled. Because writing out this grief process is hard and I got sick.

Embracing being stalled and knowing that it is ok, the book will get written if and when and how I choose to write it. 

Embracing music, in all shapes and forms. Remy started guitar lessons. I bought an autoharp. (I'm still playing it, but I find it very annoying to keep in tune.)  We had many jams, with Remy's teacher, with Remy, with each other (as a couple) and alone. My instagram/ tumblr feed is filled with guitar photos for a reason. Music is an everyday in our house.

I even wrote a (very simple) song. 

(I had an idea last night for having an ongoing weekly or biweekly or monthly jam session. I need to run that by M and see what he thinks, but I think we can do it.)

Embracing messiness. Messiness in the house and messiness in how human I am.

Embracing getting and being sick. Oh, bronchitis. Embracing my asthmatic lungs.

Embracing traveling. OK, we travel a lot every year. So that really wasn't any different, but it was fun to embrace it all! We started the year in Chicago (we actually flew home on New Years Day), then went to California - twice - to the NJ shore, and amazingly, to Antigua. Along with many other fun day trips.

Embracing uncertainty. Even as I am also embracing my power.

Embracing experimenting and being ok with no one signing up for the one class I tried to teach. Embracing not working on business stuff, at all, after that.

And finally, I got to embrace turning 40. Wow. Just wow.

2014 was a pretty amazing year, all told. I needed a lot of rest (and I took it). I grieved a lot. I tried to do my best to help other grieve. I got to be helpful and wise and also learn new things. I got to explore and nest and I embraced the hell out of my personal ebb and flow.

There were really difficult moments. There was pain. And there was joy and love and excitement.

It really was awesome.